Monday, 28 February 2011

18w6d: Babymoon

We are having a wonderful time on our babymoon. It is so luxurious to get away from the daily stresses of life, and just kick back and relax. I am loving our two weeks by the sea, soaking in the sunshine and spending long hours with my husband. I now feel the little one wiggling away every day, which is so reassuring and delightful. We are both feeling very hopeful for the future, and I love the way that my husband rubs my belly when we sit side-by-side.

Now only over a week until our 20 week scan. If we can, I would like to find out the sex, but most of all I am hoping for a perfect bill of health for this little one.

Monday, 21 February 2011

17w6d: Quickening

On 10:30am on Valentines Day, I was sitting in front of my computer focusing on a Word document, when I felt a tiny little *something* in my lower belly. At first I didn't pay it much attention, and then, when I realised what it could be, the rest of the world suddenly disappeared.

All I could focus on was these soft little flutters above my pubic bone. Flutters the like of which I had never felt before. This was the day I first felt our little one move inside me. Now, about twice a day, after I have been sitting quietly for an hour or so, I feel these little wiggles and tickles and pokes that are delightful and charming.

Each day, it is starting to feel more real.

Now, we are off for a two-week babymoon to pass the time until our 20 week scan. Fourteen quiet days near the sea (and a world class hospital) to celebrate what will hopefully be our last vacation as a family of two.

Wednesday, 9 February 2011

16w1d: Up to speed

I had a great check-up yesterday. The doctor kindly explained that they couldn't do a routine 16 week ultrasound for everyone, but she would do a uterus palpatation, fundal height measurement, and a doppler check. If any of those looked off, then she would send me for a scan.

She said that she could feel my uterus sitting just underneath my belly button, and showed me how to feel it myself. My fundal height was 14 cm (at 16 weeks it should be 16cm +/- 2cm). She had a great deal of difficulty finding the heartbeat, which made me feel better about having trouble with my home doppler. She found the soft wooshing of the ubilical cord pulse quite easily, and some sporadic sloshes of the fetus moving, and finally about 20 seconds of the loud galloping fetal heartbeat at 160 bpm, before the fetus swam away again.

I know that we didn't get an ultrasound, but all in all I felt very reassured. The doctor seemed so calm and confident that I felt like any other pregnant woman in for a routine check-up.

And now only four weeks to go until we reach the half-way point and our big 20 week morphology scan.

Monday, 7 February 2011

15w6d: Check-up tomorrow

Since the 12 week scan, my emotions have varied from relief to happiness to fear to worry. Relief that nothing bad was detected, happy that I graduated from the first trimester, fear that bad things will happen, and worry that the heartbeat was in the bottom 1% for gestational age.

I now have a noticeable bump (latest photo here), and my pregnancy was publicly announced during the last departmental meeting. Most of our friends in this city have not experienced fertility or loss, however they seem understanding of my "let's wait and see" attitude. A few of them have said to me "can I be excited for you, on your behalf?", which is sweet.

While I have heartburn, round ligament pain, a runny nose, frequent urination, headaches, and breathlessness, there is nothing unbearable. I am surprised every time I see myself in the mirror.

I individually emailed the people in my IVF support group to tell them my news, starting with "I know that it can be difficult to hear this...". Some of them have replied with congratulations, others have remained silent, which I understand perfectly.

My next check-up is tomorrow. They told me that they will do a Doppler heartbeat check, but no ultrasound. I would really love a reassuring glimpse to know that the fetus is measuring properly. Does anyone know of any secret phrases that will convince them to do an ultrasound, without having to lie about my symptoms?